The Old Un's Diary
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Stuff and nonsense
The oldiest...existing copies of The Beano
There are only 12 known existing copies of the first edition, published 70 years ago in July 1938. One of those tuppenny comics fetched £12,100 at auction in
March 2004. The enduring rascal, Dennis the Menace, is the ‘oldest’ of the current crop of characters, first appearing in March 1951 and still going strong. Other favourites over the years have included Minnie the Minx, Roger the Dodger, Biffo,
The Bash Street Kids and Lord Snooty.
Voice from the Grave
‘‘Dear Sir: I desire to put before the public my views on the reverse side of the penny. The warlike – may I go so far as to say the hectoring, truculent attitude of Britannia – as there depicted is surely calculated to give offence to another Friendly Power.
In these days of mutual good-will, the trident and the shield can only be regarded as a barbarous anachronism. I trust that they will disappear in the new issue and we shall find Britannia surrounded by the arts of peace. I would suggest that on those coins which bear the date of 1910 an umbrella might be substituted for the trident.’
Spotted in Punch, August 1910,
by Josephine Gill of Essex.
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Old Un's Diary
All the news that matters. And some that doesn't
Drop yourself innit
Ah, the perils of yoofspeak. A 19-year-old Cockney girl staying in Hertfordshire wanted a cab to take her to Bristol airport. She rang directory enquiries and, inrhyming slang, asked for a taxi: ‘I’m lookin’ for a Joe Baxi.’ The operator said that there was no listing in that name. ‘It ain’t a person,’ said the yoof, ‘It’s a cab, innit?’ Duly enlightened, the operator put her through to a business called Displaysense, in Bishop’s Stortford. Their sales assistant was confused. ‘Look, love,’ said the girl, ‘how hard is it? All I want is your cheapest cab, innit? I need it for 10 am. How much is it?’ The saleswoman quoted their cheapest price and took her address. The girl paid £180 – and the next morning, instead of a taxi, a handsome office cabinet arrived.
Bron on Brown
So, Gordon Brown isn’t that different to Blair after all. This should be no surprise to longtime Oldie readers – Bron Waugh had this to say about Brown in our pages back in 1994. Thanks to R A Watson for spotting it. ‘Brown made mincemeat of Fowler, wanting to know why the Government had spent a billion on this instead of that, in an angry, hectoring tone, full of contempt and loathing. I would not have minded this, having no particular admiration for Fowler, except that I thought Brown equally odious, and would have liked to see him humiliated too. Brown gave a foretaste of what we can expect when the Tories are wiped out in the next General Election: quite quick and glib, with an impatient, thuggish manner, and brutish gleam in his glass eye. He appears to be the answer to every British whinger’s dream – a tough, embittered proletarian, seething with resentments, who swears he knows the answers to everything. Maddened by the scent of power in his nostrils, he will stop at nothing.’
Warm thoughts
How’s this for recycling? Mourners at Dukinfield Crematorium in Manchester will now be kept warm during services by the heat generated by the furnaces.The local council admit that this is a ‘sensitive’ issue
and have promised to consult clergy and the wider community, but the Rev Vernon Marshall of Old Chapel, said ‘As a final act of generosity, it’s a lovely way for the dead to provide comfort for the living at a difficult time.’
